There is always time to renew, relive, rejoice!

I don’t know if it’s all these networking sites or the fact that we (30 + crowd) are at an age where we feel the need to reconnect with our youth. But suddenly I am in touch with over a 100, yes over a 100 of my friends from before I was 20 years old. We have all become different people, followed paths we never imagined for ourselves or each other and most of all, most of us are now parents. Monumental changes have taken place and no matter who tries to convince me that we are who we are by the time we are 18 is talking bunkum. We develop way into our 30’s at the most. I just have to look around and notice the nerds who are now millionaires, the bimbos that are brand managers and the intelligentsia that’s gone to hell. As we have found each other, we have gone on to renew friendships and regroup in the cliques of yore. I look at my mailbox and I have been messaging the same 6 girls I was closest to 15 years ago, strange! Yet the surprise has manifested in other ways, the most unexpected acquaintances have more in common with me now than they did over a decade ago. Some of them are in the same profession as me, which is lucrative in its own way and some are doing fantastic things like reform work in Afghanistan and live reportage from the Beijing Olympics.



This landslide of friends has gotten more than my share of reunion invites and though I was apprehensive for the longest time, I have to admit, I attended one and it was fine. I would have loved to handpick the crowd but then I didn’t have that choice 10 years ago, why would I now? So it was a healthy mix of the wackos, the sweeties, the sexies and the rest. I walked in late not because I like to make an appearance (only sometimes!) but because I wanted to make sure I didn’t have to wait for the interesting lot. I stayed for an hour which was another good choice, that way you get just the right dose of nostalgia. I made small talk with everyone, even the ones I didn’t make small talk with before. That’s the strange thing about serious adulthood (30+), you feel obliged to be way more polite than you were in your teens. It’s not cool to ignore after a certain age. In my experience you are likely to need each and every person you ignored for extremely crucial things like passport work, business deals and school admissions. All in all it was a wholesome experience. I felt good for the lot of us.



Friendship is a funny thing, it can be deep but you don’t even have to be in the same country and it can be faint living next door to a friend. However relationships work, everyone needs them. I think the pendulum of social interaction sways from family (as kids) to friends (in your teens) and back to family after 30-35 years. It was nice to remake friend’s, it was easier than meeting new people. I highly recommend a reunion to anyone contemplating hosting or attending one. Some people are actually so much better as grown-ups you are bound to be pleasantly surprised. No doubt old friends are gold but new ones have a lot of glitter. So get off the networking sites, the chats and the sms’s and go out there and meet them. Celebrate your accomplishments with the people that walked part of the path with you. Add a couple of drinks, good food and neutral music and you have the makings of an unforgettable evening. Let me know how it went!

Back To School

Indian kids are back to school this week. I don’t really know how most of them feel about it but the few that I know are basking in their new ‘back to school’ stuff and hoping for some fabulous extra-curricular activities this year. Our days were so much simpler. Going to a new class every April meant simpler joys like fresh mangoes in the lunch Tiffin, best friend from last year as a partner, new class books and maybe a little more respect for the one year that we had grown. I went to a fairly popular convent school of Delhi, one that imbibed a deep sense of commitment to personal achievement and performance. Every year there were new academic challenges, new books to conquer, new teachers to appease and new schools to visit for the million things we participated in. I rarely hear children speak of such plainness when they talk about school. Maybe my recent exposure to school children is limited to private schools in and around Gurgaon but I really don’t see genuine joy in their faces. The quandary lies in the fact that though we have provided a multitude of opportunities in the past 15 years it seems like we have taken a lot away too. I can name and quantify all the new provisions in schools like alternative subjects, international school trips, fencing, horse riding, archery, film making, script writing etc. I can’t put my finger on what we have taken away. Whatever it is that is devoid from our children’s lives, one thing is for sure, it is taking them away from basic and necessary entertainment like reading and the outdoors!



Our children think the outdoors require peripherals, perhaps a picnic or at least a pony to ride on. Whatever happened to bug hunting (Oh shush to PETA …. Bug hunting, knee deep in soil is the core of childhood discovery plus the bugs multiply way faster than our kids can kill them!), playing ‘house’, climbing trees (there are a few left, at least in Delhi there are!), playing catch, hopscotch, throw ball (is that even a sport?). All that was fun, maybe not awe inspiring and deeply intriguing but it did leave space for human contact and conversation. What do two kids playing video games together actually ‘do’ together …. Nothing! They have digitized alter egos communicating for them. All the joy, energy, excitement and fun are actually relayed through two unfeeling illustrations. How frightening is that? Please don’t get me wrong, I am a big one for video games albeit the old fashioned arcade variety but I swear I can put a 12 year old to shame when it comes to ‘Pacman' but it’s still not something I will invite a bunch of friends over for, not now and not 20 years ago.



Since I don’t have a generalized solution for this heavy issue, I have decided to make a few changes on the home front. I am at the threshold of some serious motherhood, my daughter just turned 2 and I am beginning to see meaning in the term ‘terrible twos’. Before I begin, a small piece of advice for mommies to be – the first 6 months are not the hard part …. Everything after that is! Now that my daughter can communicate in complete sentences I plan to practice mini plays with her through the week, just ½ hour a day, then we will perform it for the family on a Sunday. I have written 3 plays with just two characters, one scene and 5 dialogues, she seems to love it so far! She can also walk and run confidently, so we will race every day, if it’s not with me then with her dad, her maid, her granddad or even one of her adorable little friends. She can now hold an object steady, so she will draw me one image a day, yesterday is was a very poor looking cow and today I received a suspicious looking snake, I think it started out as a flower! She will spend 2-3 hours outdoors provided the weather cooperates, while she is there she can play in the mud (off late the mud is contained within the hands, so this is a plausible situation), she can look for ‘safe’ bugs (what I mean is preferably imaginary), she can try to tell colors of the flowers, she learn a few of their names, she can meet everyone in the park, she can run free, the options are endless. She has never been into toys and I don’t see the value in a $50 toy that she will either destroy or hate within a week. There were times I felt buying fewer toys was a level of deprivation but now that my daughter is such a confident, highly communicative, imaginative and funny little person, I don’t think I was entirely wrong. No two kids are alike but I think the basic nurturing they need is absolutely similar. Children need time, love, security and routine above all other things and this is something I have learnt from experience.



So whether your child is 2 or 12, their needs remain as basic, the way we fulfill them becomes different that’s all. This year let them roam free, let this year be their ‘pseudo year off’, let this year be the year all activities are organic and involve either one parent. As parents we are all used to sacrifice, this is yet another manifestation of it. School was always meant to impart education, let’s not look at them for everything. We hope our choice of school provides good education and good discipline the plus on that can be motivation, inspiration, confidence, independence and courage. So if your child’s school lacks in any of those areas it is better to start providing the missing traits at home.

Gotta Getaway

Every once in a while life becomes a web of stuff. Random stuff, from work schedules and deadlines to dentist appointments and kid’s school functions, life is tough. Its way easier for DINK (double income no kids) couples but everyone deserves a break. The ‘holi’ weekend is round the corner and though I wish ‘holi’ was on Friday, a Saturday will most certainly do. It’s the Wednesday’s and Thursday’s that really kill a festival holiday, they don’t qualify as satisfactory. ‘Holi’ weekend is barely three weeks away yet a quick, slightly unplanned getaway is definitely possible. Most people vacation in the winter and a rebound refresher is a must. For me personally even booking into a nearby 5 star hotel is a possibility. The service is slicker than the maid at home, beds are miraculously luxurious, a tub is quintessential and who would mind a range of cuisines to order to the room. Before I get too suggestive and convince the whole load of you to swamp the Taj’s and the ‘Hyatt’s’ of India, consider a few more options.



Most of the large Indian cities are peppered with quaint resorts, forts and palaces, all within 250 km radius. This makes India a getaway treasure. National dailies are packed with holiday advertisements for strangely familiar sounding clubs that you never knew existed. Someone has to dare try them and then blog about it! Really, let’s do everyone a favour and pick one holiday club, fort, resort, riverside camp, spa or even a pilgrimage and go there. Head out for ‘holi’, India! Take the gujia’s, the beers and the friends along. See, this is the beauty of India; it’s phenomenally flexible on matters of prayer and celebration. ‘Diwali’ is a day to stay home, clean, cleanse, beautify and wait for the gods to pass by. Holi on the other hand is free reign, just remember to have fun. The ‘puja’ is a day before anyway. So pray, pack and go.



Some of my favourites picks for this ‘holi’ is the beach or a restored fort/palace. I want to try and give everyone a direction to head in, North India won’t have trouble finding a fort and the South has some of the nicest beaches to choose from. With 5700 km of mainland coastline, we really have a huge selection. Assuming a lot of these trips will be groups, giving a few choices will keep at least some happy. Every group has ‘beach’ people and every group has ‘history’ people. This may be a good time to find out which ones your friends are. Forts and palaces have always been associated with an old world charm. They are mysterious and enigmatic buildings that housed people out of fairy tales. If walls could speak, some of us would probably move in forever. Most of the Indian ‘heritage’ hotels have tied up with leading hospitality giants and retained their original architecture and décor, to produce fabulous holiday hotels a stone’s throw from most cities. Rooms have high ceilings, the bathrooms are almost as big as the rooms, the balconies are romantic, the furniture is usually a century old and the turbaned bearers are a delight.



The beach is my other most favourite destination whether it’s for a weekend or for a whole summer. I don’t even mind it in the rain. Thankfully all our beaches are tropical and it never really gets cold. Imagine, two days of communing with nature. I don’t care how clichéd this has gotten but a sunset on the beach is by far one of Mother Nature’s most precious gifts. Rainbows, lightening, aurora borealis and eclipses come in close after. Days seem longer on a beach. The stars shine brighter (provided you aren’t at a rave party) and the food always tastes good. In fact going to the beach right after winter is therapeutic in many ways, you will get rid of the winter paleness and you will get a ‘weight gain’ reality check. Don’t get put off, knowledge is power. It’s only when you know the problem that you can solve it!



Enough preaching, I hope at least some of you will log on to yatra.com or heritagehotelsofindia.com, indiaweekendgetaways.com, travelershub.com and do yourselves a favour. Check out a cool gallery of holiday images we produced. That will surely seal the deal! Click on the link below.

View Holiday Stock Photos by PhotosIndia.com

Colors Of India

I was surprised to learn that Islam came to India long before the Muslim invasions. It was a balmy day in Kuwait and our guests were discussing the similarities between South Indians and Kuwaiti’s. Another new fact came into light; it was the trading of spices that led Arabs to the Malabar Coast in South India. Back in the 7th century it was merely an Islamic influence that could be felt; the invasions of course reinforced the faith firmly on Indian soil. This inclusion added further to India’s colorful culture and people. It was the trader families of Kerala and other parts of the Malabar Coasts that were the closest to their Arab business associates, and this closeness led to a slow conversion into Islam. In Malabar the Mappilas may have been the first community to convert to Islam.

Today, 16.4% of India is Muslim. They have contributed considerably to the fields of performing arts, crafts, politics, education and business ventures. Some of India’s leading literary giants, artists, film stars and leaders are Muslim and this alone makes Indian society a diverse and enriched structure. India’s most famous landmark the Taj Mahal is a classic example of Islamic architecture and construction prowess.

The union of so many faiths is felt most during festival season. Diwali follows Eid and Christmas follows Diwali. For almost 3 months, India is in a blanket of faith, celebration and thanksgiving. Eid is a Muslim festival that marks the end of Ramadan, the Islamic holy month of fasting. During the month of Ramadan, Muslims observe a strict fast, they do not eat from sunrise to sunset, and some don’t even have water. They donate generously, participate in charitable activities and promote a sense of peace and unity. It is a time of spiritual renewal for those who observe it. At the end of the month, Muslims throughout the world observe an exciting three day celebration called Eid ul Fitr. A common practice is for people to stay up and watch the full moon rise on the night on Eid. The day of the festival, a typical Muslim family wakes up early and does the first prayer of the day. They then attend prayers in mosques, parks, stadiums and arenas. The crowd greets and embraces each other as a gesture of love and celebration. The festivities continue at people’s homes after the congressional prayer. Special sweets and foods are prepared for friends and family. The finest clothes and jewelry are the highlights of the day. This is an occasion with great religious significance; the celebration is jubilant and hearty. It is a day of forgiveness, peace, brotherhood and unity. Muslims also mark this day with thanks to God for his guidance and blessings bestowed upon them.

Ultimately we all seek the same things from our faith – security, a sense of belonging, peace of mind, the love of God and a prevalence of brotherhood.