Our children think the outdoors require peripherals, perhaps a picnic or at least a pony to ride on. Whatever happened to bug hunting (Oh shush to PETA …. Bug hunting, knee deep in soil is the core of childhood discovery plus the bugs multiply way faster than our kids can kill them!), playing ‘house’, climbing trees (there are a few left, at least in Delhi there are!), playing catch, hopscotch, throw ball (is that even a sport?). All that was fun, maybe not awe inspiring and deeply intriguing but it did leave space for human contact and conversation. What do two kids playing video games together actually ‘do’ together …. Nothing! They have digitized alter egos communicating for them. All the joy, energy, excitement and fun are actually relayed through two unfeeling illustrations. How frightening is that? Please don’t get me wrong, I am a big one for video games albeit the old fashioned arcade variety but I swear I can put a 12 year old to shame when it comes to ‘Pacman' but it’s still not something I will invite a bunch of friends over for, not now and not 20 years ago.
Since I don’t have a generalized solution for this heavy issue, I have decided to make a few changes on the home front. I am at the threshold of some serious motherhood, my daughter just turned 2 and I am beginning to see meaning in the term ‘terrible twos’. Before I begin, a small piece of advice for mommies to be – the first 6 months are not the hard part …. Everything after that is! Now that my daughter can communicate in complete sentences I plan to practice mini plays with her through the week, just ½ hour a day, then we will perform it for the family on a Sunday. I have written 3 plays with just two characters, one scene and 5 dialogues, she seems to love it so far! She can also walk and run confidently, so we will race every day, if it’s not with me then with her dad, her maid, her granddad or even one of her adorable little friends. She can now hold an object steady, so she will draw me one image a day, yesterday is was a very poor looking cow and today I received a suspicious looking snake, I think it started out as a flower! She will spend 2-3 hours outdoors provided the weather cooperates, while she is there she can play in the mud (off late the mud is contained within the hands, so this is a plausible situation), she can look for ‘safe’ bugs (what I mean is preferably imaginary), she can try to tell colors of the flowers, she learn a few of their names, she can meet everyone in the park, she can run free, the options are endless. She has never been into toys and I don’t see the value in a $50 toy that she will either destroy or hate within a week. There were times I felt buying fewer toys was a level of deprivation but now that my daughter is such a confident, highly communicative, imaginative and funny little person, I don’t think I was entirely wrong. No two kids are alike but I think the basic nurturing they need is absolutely similar. Children need time, love, security and routine above all other things and this is something I have learnt from experience.
So whether your child is 2 or 12, their needs remain as basic, the way we fulfill them becomes different that’s all. This year let them roam free, let this year be their ‘pseudo year off’, let this year be the year all activities are organic and involve either one parent. As parents we are all used to sacrifice, this is yet another manifestation of it. School was always meant to impart education, let’s not look at them for everything. We hope our choice of school provides good education and good discipline the plus on that can be motivation, inspiration, confidence, independence and courage. So if your child’s school lacks in any of those areas it is better to start providing the missing traits at home.
